NERVOUS!

Tomorrow is weigh in day and yeah I skipped last week and all I've done the past week is eat...I haven't tracked anything and I sure as hell haven't even exercised! WTF is up with that???

UGH LIFE IS HARD!

I want it so bad I can almost taste it ... so why isn't it enough?
I've watched people get sick and even die from the same lifestyle I'm living...why isn't it enough?
I cry myself to sleep at night because I hate what I do to myself...why isn't it enough?

I'll never know I just have to keep trying each day and each day work just a little bit harder at one little thing that today I didn't achieve...maybe it's remembering to take my vitamin or maybe it's to just drink 8 ounces more of water...just something small and slowly over time I have to believe that it'll all come together. Kind of like putting together a puzzle? Some people start with the edges and then work inwards, other start with pieces that look similar from a section and work on sections of the puzzle till it comes together, and others yet still just match pieces in no particular order. There are many ways to achieve the end result but you're way may not be the same way as our neighbor - so while we may heed and give advice just remember that what works for you may not work for someone else...

...and because of that I need to also remember that what worked for me 5 years ago may not work now as I've not only changed my perception of who I am I've also changed my lifestyle.